NARC – A Review by James Welch, April 9, 2016, at 3:03 p.m.
I was digging through my NES collection when I came across a real gem of a game. That gem in case you didn’t read the title, or carelessly clicked here by accident is of course, NARC . I don’t know how many of you are old enough to remember the absolutely awesome Public Service Announcements (PSAs) of the 1980s, but I do; they taught me all kinds of stuff. Stuff like drug dealers hang out at middle schools and only peddle their wares to good looking people, my brain will go sunny side up if I indulge in street pharmaceuticals, and crack was a killer waiting patiently for me to take my first hit, then sink its malevolent fangs into me and take my life.
Thankfully, First Lady Nancy Reagan, and her “Just Say No” campaign, as well as my favorite Saturday morning cartoon characters were there to stop me from becoming a despicable drug addict. Of course, I also knew I could just call 9-1-1 and the local police department, who would pull up in a convertible 1988 Porche 911 Turbo Carrera and proceed to take care of all the scum in my neighborhood.
OK, maybe not that last part, but those 1980’s PSA’s were spot on, I tell you. That last part? Well that last part is what happens when you call the cops to handle the scum of the earth in the Nintendo Entertainment System (NES) game NARC. Forget taking a “Bite out of Crime”, I wanna blow criminals into pieces with my rocket launcher.
NARC was a side scrolling action arcade game developed by Williams Electronics and released in 1988. NARC was one of the first games to be scrutinized for excessive violence (yep, before politicians decided Mortal Kombat was the most evil video game of all time) and was the brunt of parental persecution. A hit at the arcades, it was only a matter a time until it made its way to a home console; this drug dealer blasting and busting rampage would find itself landing on the family friendly NES…What?
I don’t know how NARC slipped by the oppressive Nintendo censors, but for an 11-year-old with an excessive lust for blood and television-fueled hatred for all things narcotic, NARC was just what the street-doctor ordered.
In NARC you play Max Force, a motorcycle street helmet wearing, machine gun toting super cop, who is here to chew bubblegum and kick ass. He forgot the bubblegum, but he brought his rocket launcher and along with his buddy Hit Man (player two, who for some odd reason is racially confused and alternates between black and white). They are coming to take down those scum sucking drug dealers. They should have said no to drugs when they had the chance.
NARC Visuals
Graphically, NARC is nothing special. The levels all look the same (no really, exactly the same). There are only a few enemy types, and they look like something a middle schooler would draw with MS Paint. You’ll know you have seen something special when a guy who looks like Ziggy Stardust in sunglasses starts chucking giant heroin-filled syringes at you; at least I think they are syringes. For all I know they could be lawn darts.
I have a sneaking suspicion that whoever designed the graphics for this game did the same drugs the game was telling you not to do. He was also most likely involved in casting Ben Affleck as Daredevil…and Gigli.
NARC Gameplay
Now gameplay is where NARC gets all shiny…err shines. There is nothing more exhilarating than blowing horribly drawn, knife wielding, psychopathic clowns to pieces with a rocket launcher. Yes, to pieces, particles and poorly animated portions. I hate clowns! Anyway, NARC is a blast to play, particularly if you can get a friend to join you in your mission to clean up the streets.
How Max Force and Hit Man tackle the vile street pharmacists is up to you. You can go in guns blazing, utilizing your extensive arsenal of two weapons to kill the felonious felons and confiscate their ill-gotten cash and drugs Vic Mackey-style, or you can channel your inner Kojak, and throw the “cuffs on ’em.”
As much as I love gunning down baddies, there is something so hilariously gratifying about watching an obvious sex offender in a trench coat fly across the screen as he flashes me, his naughty bits scantily covered by the word “Busted.” I don’t know, maybe it’s just me… Yeah, it’s probably just me. Regardless, if you want just some good old fashioned 8-bit carnage than NARC is the game for you. The gameplay is like Herbert from Family Guy… You know you shouldn’t, but you can’t help but like it.
NARC Soundtrack
Moving on from old perverts to sound and music (there is a flow chart in here somewhere), we find NARC’s best attribute. If you dig gritty 8-bit chip tune versions of rocking arcade music, then NARC has you covered. Rare, visionary developers of such classics as Goldeneye, Perfect Dark, and Kinect Sports: Season 2 did a mighty fine job of emulating the original arcade game’s soundtrack. Such love shows throughout the whole four tracks that resonate in your ears across the game’s eight levels.
OL, you will hear the same songs over and over, but damn it they are really good, so just go with it. Just think of the music as if it’s an IPod Nano Generation 1 with 4 songs on it: “Thunderstruck” by AC/DC, “Master of Puppets” by Metallica, “Deep Cover” by Dr. Dre and Snoop Dogg, well, and “You’re Beautiful” by James Blunt. Three awesome songs and one makes my ears bleed song you can’t skip. It still beats the music in BattleTech.
Conclusion
Overall, NARC is a fun little time-waster that took the drug scare of the 80s and turned it into an excuse to go on a police-sanctioned rampage. I’m not going to say it’s a must have, but it’s definitely worth a play through. Just remember kiddies: Don’t do drugs, not only do they fund terrorism, but their rampant usage funded a Pee Wee Herman PSA. When a guy who was caught playing with himself in a theater is telling us not to do drugs, I think we all should listen.
What do you guys think? Is NARC just a fun little time waster, or more than that to you? Let us know in the comments below.
