7/5/2017 – There is no doubt online dating has been a game changer. In previous generations meeting your potential life mate at work or school was commonplace. This is no longer the status quo. The EEOC reports a staggering 12.5K sexual harassment cases filed every year since 2010. Men and women are much more careful to ask a coworker out in the era of litigation. Social media has also unveiled any secrecy about a potential date’s private life. Women and men can friend someone on Facebook and see where they work, who their friends are, their interests, family and just about anything else.
We’ve covered some of the perverse underbelly of the online world with our Creeper Hunter series, but that doesn’t mean that many people aren’t successfully using online dating to meet their ideal partners. Also, Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan’s classic romantic comedy, You’ve Got Mail (1998), surely helped to legitimize the long-distance online relationship. While online dating has come a long way since the AOL days and the novelty of receiving an ‘electronic mail’, online dating etiquette has not. Sending cell phone shots of your genitals, aka ‘dick pics’ as they are commonly known, probably isn’t the best way to get a girl’s attention. If you disagree check out this game (Cobra Club), where the sole mission objective is to do just that. Seriously.
Here is some online dating advice.
Images – Everyone knows a picture is worth a thousand words. This is equally true for online dating. According to the blog on Ok Cupid, “Adding one photo gets you at least 2x the likes (and your likes increase if you add more photos). Plus, it gives people a better idea of who you are.” Make sure the photo is current and honest. (See the above social media). If you post that one photo of you when you ripped like BEASTMODE and swimming with sharks off the coast of Bora Bora, it’s going to send up red flags. Have a beer belly? Lost your hair? Might as well show the accurate you, because when you finally meet up, she is going to find out anyway. That being said, before you start posting photos a little grooming and a few sit ups never hurt anyone.
Women are equally guilty of this as well. Judged in society more on their looks than men according to many researchers, women will carefully choose which photos they will add to their online dating profiles. It may be an outdated photo from a trip to Las Vegas, or an older photo when they were fifteen pounds lighter. A dead give away is an online profile where the woman only has one pose; holding the cell phone high above her head and looking up.
Starting communication – If we didn’t make it clear with the photos you choose for your profile, HONESTY, is important to successful online dating. Now, assume you didn’t come across as horribly desperate and you’ve managed to strike up a conversation. This is where RESPECT comes into play and you’ll be staging ground rules that will define the remainder of the relationship.
Dudes, the two most common things you can do to turn off a girl you just met are, being too clingy and texting her thousand times a day, or being a total perv. If she is busty, of course she already knows that and probably very used to guys staring at her. Don’t immediately beg her to send bikini photos. You’ll get dropped faster than a Mike Tyson uppercut dropped opponents. And of fuck’s sake, successful guys are busy. They don’t have time to text non-stop. Women are attracted to successful, confident men.
Gals, we don’t mind chasing you some, but don’t make the game impossible to win. If a girl is snobbish or too distant, he’s likely going to move on. Where as pornography may be corroding what men think the ideal woman is, too much Hollywood and Netflix is equally destroying what women think men should be. Not every man will be over 6′, own a beach house in Malibu, and be a veterinary surgeon. If the woman wants to take charge of the communication, let be known right up front that she’ll be running the show, and if he’s not okay with that, it’s best to move on.
Know thyself – When starting any project, including online dating, have the finish line in mind from the very beginning. Take some time to reflect why you want start a relationship and what do you want achieve. You may want to ask yourself some basic questions:
- Is long distance okay, or do I want to meet someone locally?
- Do I have the time, income and emotional collateral to date someone?
- Will the relationship be sexual or ‘just friends’?
One caveat here; Having a game plan and goal in mind is stalwart and time tested advice, but love is fickle and affairs of the heart don’t always fit into nice little lists. Being spontaneous and unpredictable may work in your favor here. Taking some chances now again may be exactly what you need to break out of rut or lead you in a new direction that you hadn’t previously thought of.
Too good to be true – Finally, when it comes to online dating, Buyer Beware. If an online profile looks too good to be true, it probably is. So if you happen to ‘stumble’ across a 23 supermodel who is indecently wealthy, owns her own gun manufacturing conglomerate, and is requesting all of your passwords to your bank accounts… GTFO! The same applies for gals here too. Does Mr. Right have a profile on Tinder, Bumble, POF and Match and is he only trying to get laid? In both cases if your ‘spidey sense’ starts tingling to the early onset of BULLSHIT, then it may be a good time to pullout. Safety first, is the slogan on job sites.
What comes second though? 😝
Hope you have enjoyed our tips for online dating. Add you own advice, tips, or stories in the comments below and thanks for reading Slickster Magazine.