Worst demo of the week – Julia Luise, Brat
10/4/2017 – It’s true. At Slickster we get a plethora of music submissions, and we love that. Maybe, I’m having a shitty day.. or shitty week. Or maybe the cold snap is pissing me off. It might be the withdrawal from Percocet that’s making me irritable. A fucking a rock legend, Tom Petty, dies, and now you can’t even go to an outside concert without the threat of getting mowed down by a maniac with a mini-gun.
Or…. This new single that appeared in my inbox was so fucking awful, I had to rant a little. Yeah, I know what you’re going to say… ‘By writing a blog on it, all you’re doing is helping the song gain traction on Google“. I retort, “FUCK YOU”. This has got to be the worst piece of garbage I’ve sifted through in a while.
At first I thought it was a Portlandia parody, but alas, no, it was a real album submission. Dutifully, I made it through one whole listening, but it took a lot of eyeball rolling. If my ears could ‘eyeball roll’ they would have done that too. While everyone can relate to a breaking up with someone you once cared about, and the suffering that social media has inflicted upon the world, Louise is desperate to try and sell it on the single ‘Brat’. Good job kicking over the mailbox; That’s a federal offense. Mailbox Lives Matter too you know.
Generally, at Slickster, we make an effort not to write negative reviews. It’s a policy that has long been under scrutiny. Be honest, but not mean. Truthful reviews are helpful to everyone. If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all. So, what can we say about the WORST DEMO OF THE WEEK? The guitars were in tune. That’s a start. At least the guitars were in tune. Geez…
While most of the comments on the YT video are glowing praises, not every shares the same opinion. Here’s what a few more humorous people have commented:
Literally, this is the ear pollution that vindicates every fucking loser with a Fender Mustang into believing that ‘music is the universal language‘. So, you got butt-hurt because your fake friends wrote mean things about you on Facebook and you took 5 whole minutes to write it your diary? Add some uninspired mediocre guitar strumming and… VIOLA! You have an indie rock masterpiece.
For the love of whatever deity you pray to you (Ahem… Carl Sagan…) stop creating music this awful. There are many other productive things you can do with your time. I’m sure the line at your coffee shop could use some attention. The world DOES NOT need another angst riddle shitfest about how your life sucks. There are people with real problems, and real musicians who actually take the time and effort to work on their craft.
Julia Luise please go away. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have a handful of Percocet and some Heartbreakers to listen to. Learning to Fly, but I ain’t got wings. Coming down, is the hardest thing. Jesus jumping fucking christ, We’ll all miss you Mr. Petty. #RIPTOMPETTY